During my first three years in OA, I was one of the stars. I shed 100 pounds (45 kg) in ten months and kept it off, even through pregnancy. I shared at meetings and generally felt recovered.
Long before I began overeating again, I was in deep trouble. I was coasting, and as someone pointed out, you can only coast downhill.
I fell into full-blown food addiction, eating to the point of physical pain day after day. I gained 60 pounds (27 kg) in six months. I tried to abstain but could only manage a few days at a time. Soon, each attempt failed by lunchtime. I all but resigned myself to a 400-pound (181-kg) body and an early grave.
But my OA friends would not let me sink into oblivion. They kept calling and urging me to come back, do more, try again.
I decided to give myself and the program one more chance, to really commit to using every Tool every day to see if I could turn my life around. I made a call and got a sponsor. Then I called someone else. I started reading the Big Book, the Twelve and Twelve, and Lifeline. I balanced the books for my home group. I started to feel better!
It has been three weeks, and I now have a beautiful, clean abstinence.
The Big Book tells a story about “Jim,” who eventually died because of his alcoholism. Why? Because he “failed to enlarge his spiritual life.”
I believed that I could stay in recovery simply by maintaining my weight loss. It is clear to me now that recovery depends upon a constantly expanding spiritual life. Thank you, OA friends, for caring enough not to let me go.
— Lifeline, May 1987